March 19th, 2004

Subject: tell me what you think.... Time: 02:31 am

So i have been wondering. how do other people see me? Post anonymously and tell me the following: 1.How you see me in general? 2.What about me bothers you? 3.What about me makes you happy? 4.What do you pray for me? 5. ANYTHING else u have been wanting to say to me.

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February 18th, 2004

Subject: marriage Time: 11:08 am

so moriah and i are having money probs... we figure since SO many places are making it leagal for same sexes to marry we might as well marry for tax reasons.. all are invited to come to the wedding..i'll post dates soon.

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Subject: cortney hotline Time: 09:58 am

676-5689 APRYL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE ART THOU? i got fired...i called in sick...and they said i never called...so they fired me??? i have bills to pay this is not good.

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February 12th, 2004

Subject: gah Time: 06:50 am

im hungry...im at work...taking my 40 min lunch cuz they forgot to give me my first break....40 mins and no food to eat...they will stop at nothing to mock me... i need to have two jobs to afford to live... i may divorce my mother... i live with my sister in a "room for rent" now but she is never there when i get off work or when i get up in the morning...so i live alone really...you should all come visit me...i dont like being alone ALL the time... ash... robin.. joel... tyler... miss miss miss MISS!

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February 5th, 2004

Current Music: JASON MARAZ Subject: PICTURES! Time: 08:15 pm Current Mood: bouncy

play outfits   work attire

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February 4th, 2004

Current Music: the who Subject: oh dear oh dear! Time: 11:21 am

i am eating cake... and its not my birthday yet... kiddies...check it out.. club bang saturday the 7th(80's dancing) be there at 10 with 5 bucks to get in for more info(like directions) go to www.clubbang.com and those of you in town...we are leaving from barnes and noble at 8 meaning be there before 8!

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February 1st, 2004

Subject: sick Time: 09:11 pm Current Mood: sick

i am sick. m is sick. church tonite was good.

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January 31st, 2004

Subject: 2 am photo shoot fake mustaches included Time: 12:24 pm

i am happy m is not. shes PISSED! oh frightening!$!#%$^%$@!!!!  shakespeare? thoughtful..."devious"  "oh GODS SAKES look at that" says i "grrr" says m "No really! LOOK AT THAT!" says i "i DONT see anything" says m  "dont laugh dont laugh dont laugh" "GOOD NESS gOD GET THAT THING AWAY FROM US! THE HIDEOUSNESS OF IT!!!"

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Subject: no more gangsta Time: 10:17 am

man..digital cameras are too much fun...i cant just pic one picture and stick to it. so hows this kiddies... club bang...(thanks kerry) saturday nite of the 7th main room plays brit pop, indie, elctroclash, and english 80's addy-7070 hollywood blvd. I THINK...this is where i shall party

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January 30th, 2004

Subject: dude Time: 01:10 pm

seriously my icon rocks...so effin gangsta.

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Current Music: the beatles-eleanor rigby Subject: oh dear oh dear! Time: 09:31 am

i tired this whole diet thing...but when i was about to eat a bananna i saw the donuts...(ive had this obession with donuts lately)...so i put the bananna down and ate donuts for breakfast..then after i felt guilty and ate the bananna too.. haha! oh my.. BIRTHDAY IS COMING SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON! im excited. I NEED INFO ON 80'S CLUBS...im going on friday nite of the 6th!!!!! if i can find one dang it!

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January 28th, 2004

Subject: ittty with your glazzies just a bit Time: 10:25 am

i am at m's. today i tried to sleep in. it didnt work. i am now doing laundry..OH the excitement..but at least i can realx a bit before work. so next weekend...oh we are gonna party...im gonna be 19. i dont care much about that..except that it gives me a reason to get kids together to go to an 80's club and go dancing...mmm this shall be fun...im even getting off work..at least i better be getting off work! *shakes fist*

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January 27th, 2004

Subject: OUCH.. Time: 09:53 am

What will your Funeral be like? by rashock Username You will die by: You body was found mangled in a brutal death from an insane lover or jealous significate other.The murderer was sentenced to death row but the chair or gas was too good for them. They sowed you up in a bag and tossed you in your casket, It's a closed case unless your friends and family want to be sick. Death Date: February 2, 2023 Number attending your funeral? 180 How much will you leave to friends and family? $1,310,788 Created with quill18's MemeGen 2.0!

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January 24th, 2004

Subject: do not attempt the following.. Time: 12:48 am

..i accepted a bet from my mom on thursday afternoon. she said i COULDNT fit the contents of my room into my ford mustang..i said i COULD...sooo long story short i failed my attempt by not being able to fit my bed, desk, or dresser into the car...so my mother won my house key... i am now living out of my car...and i have no phone...so if u want to get ahold of me u cant. :] but tonite i am at m's. well love to you all MUAH <33333 p.s. the picture(ICON) is me when i woke up this morning...its so sweet the way my hair is sticking strait up.

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January 21st, 2004

Current Music: minus the bear. Subject: hmmm Time: 01:20 pm

xCisTUFFx: who ya talking to antiscenes: HIM xCisTUFFx: alfy? antiscenes: FCUK YOU!!!!!!!!!! i smell like fcuk her! so does m. today we went to iron wok. when the waitress came we didnt look at her and didnt like that she kept asking us what we wanted when we told her we didnt know yet..then when she was gone we would try to pronounce the words on the menu...and m asked me questions that i didnt know the answer to and the waitress snuck up on us and started to answer them, we didnt like that...when we found out they didnt have sushi we ran out when our waitress wasnt looking. we actually RAN out of the resturant. we went to the library after lunch(we ate sushi at the mall then m bought a gap sweater then we got smoothies.)i got animal farm and wuthering heights...which i have no idea if it will be good.

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January 20th, 2004

Current Music: bright eyes Subject: its cold out..and early.. Time: 08:00 am

reading clockwork orange... shelly is coming out next month..we will party and i will enjoy the company for all its worth...oh heaven i hope she comes on my birthday! i got off work early yesterday nite...i hope that happens again tonite or wed nite..

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January 17th, 2004

Subject: the idiocracy Time: 11:48 pm

i should be asleep the word fuck is void of meaning...it should be used sparingly. i am thinking i hate most of what i am. some of you remind me i hate that even more everything is basically shit... another word thats lost alot of meaning from over use i dont know what to live for i work a crappy job i feel like im trapped i dont love my family i wonder if i even love anyone anymore...well..i do adore people...but do i love them...i dont think so ..i wish i did. my life has nothing in it worth living for...i wont off myself so dont worry your pretty little heads i like to drink yes i love to get drunk but i wont the only reason you would care about any of this is to gossip and eat away at me your all like vultures i am one too see this how you remind me...i hate when you remind me. cough syrup...will that really fix all your problems? how about just plain old weed? no wait.."you guys want some coke?" hell just do every god damn thing under the sun until you end up right back where you started you little bastard..only this time you can do it all over again with no brain cells, and the body of an 80 year old. andy would be proud of how i am expressing myself...he will die soon...hes eating away at himself...instead of eating away at others. see hes nice and thinks when you fuck him over its his fault. why am i not who i was anymore. i know there must be something left of her. but lately shes just a memory...a split personality that has ceased to come upon me anymore. i dont know what i am doing anymore...theres no real goal...im just raming my head into a brick wall as hard as i can over and over again to make myself do one of two things....wake up and start living..or just not wake up at all and die. i dont know how to get back to God. I dont. I pray, i do. and i feel he is watching over me. but i dont feel content. i dont know how to rest in him. i dont. ive tried reading my bible...its a chore...i dont know how to make it not...its a chore to fix yourself...but im not supose to...he is...what the hell does that mean...i mean cuz im not spose to let him do all the work...so how do i know when its my turn to take on the load? or part of it? i used to know how to be encouraging...i dont anymore...it all seems hopeless to me...dating makes me laugh...you dont even know...theres always doubt in your head. ..you cant really love someone your always doubting.. maybe my mothes right...im fucked in the head...well she'll be glad to learn she's won. oh i almost forgot...the funny thing is i dont even know why i am writing this in here. i hate live journal...most of the people who even read my journal havent even talked to me in months...yeah i know i havent really done all i could to help you out either...its all just one big circle cuz were all the same crap. and i know most of you wont know what to say to this...so please...dont worry..it will make me feel better then pathetic attempts to tell me how to fix myself when your wondering how the heck YOUR supposed to get fixed and come back to life.

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January 14th, 2004

Subject: hey there is that for me? Time: 01:29 pm

whos gonna be 19 soon? oh it doesnt matt cuz today ashleys 18. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! <3YA GIRL

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December 19th, 2003

Subject: no seriously.. Time: 05:44 pm

..i dont have internet anymore.. so really...go away.. p.s. im now living in temecula..no more sd..

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December 11th, 2003

Subject: you know dear..i think your right. Time: 03:48 pm

3 finals out of my way...though im still worried about the history one i took...*pray??????* meh...i went to bed this morning at 1:30 then woke up at 4 studied for an hour and couldnt take it anymore so i went back to bed till 7...now im gonna go sleep till who knows when...but come 4 in the morning tomorrow...there will be pranks...YAY! i love my hall of girls, were gonna get everyone.

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